


It's Roasting Time...

by abusemesoftly



Category: IT - Stephen King
Genre: Don't Judge Me, Drinking, M/M, Melanie Martinez References, Roast Battle, Roasting, Song Lyrics, Underage Drinking, bill vapes, brief mentions of drugs, dont vape kids, i'm terrible at roasting, just weed though, lyrics, music inspired, tiktok inspired
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-02
Updated: 2019-10-02
Packaged: 2020-11-15 03:06:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20859200
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/abusemesoftly/pseuds/abusemesoftly
Summary: Richie and Eddie get called out. Now that they're dating can they still roast each other like they did before they got together? The losers find out one night after a fun hang out.





	It's Roasting Time...

**Author's Note:**

> Alright guys, listen. I loved Melanie Martinez's old album. And I wanted to like her knew one. I don't. that being said, I do love certain lines of the new songs. How do I know some of the lines if I don't like them? Don't judge me! I am on tiktok, you guys are welcome to follow me, or not, if you hate tiktok thats fine.  
The thing with tiktok though, is I can watch not only hilarious videos, cute adorable sweet videos, really hot people videos, but also some great cosplay videos! And trust me when I say that my For You page on tiktok is full of It and It: Chapter 2 cosplays.  
So, I found a cosplayer that had done some cool videos of Richie and Eddie, and then I saw the one. I saw them do a video to the line from one of M.M's new songs, and I just loved the idea that they did so much, I had to write it out!!!  
All that being said...let's get started!!!

Richie and Eddie had always had a special bond. Best friends, but not the way that Richie and Stan were best friends, or Bill and Eddie were best friends. Richie knew that at the end of the day Stan would always come for him if he needed help. But Richie also knew pretty quickly that he would only need help the day Eddie said he didn't want anything to do with him anymore. It took them 6 years of being friends(and a gut wrenching game of truth and dare) for the both of them to realize their relationship went deeper than friends ever could. 

It was now their summer going into their junior year of high school, and they had been officially dating for about 4 months now. All of the other losers had sensed they would be getting together and had placed bets on what would come of it. Mike said that it would bring out the soft side of Richie he had personally only seen once, late at night when Richie was sleep deprived, and maybe a little not sober. Bill said they would end up ditching them more often to spend time together. Stan said he would end up going through a whole bottle of Advil by Christmas because of the bickering. So far Stan was the only one on his way to winning. 4 months in, 4 months to go, and he was more than half way through a large bottle that he now just carried with him at all times. 

To say they brought out the best in each other would be...a statement for sure, but no one was sure if they had been worse on their own secretly pining and miserable, or obviously deeply in love and somehow louder. 

Today Richie had actually showed up to Bill's house by himself, waltzing in and welcoming his friends. 

“Hey guys.” Ben said trying to finish some homework before they got their night started. 

“Who ya talking to Benjamin? Just me here.” Rich said and that made him look up, confused. 

“Oh, well, hey Richie.” He gave a smile and went back to work. 

Richie just chuckled and went into the kitchen to catch up with Bill and Mike. Beverly, Eddie and Stan walked in about five minutes later and finally Ben closed his books, greeting the last of their group. 

They were having and end of summer “party.” They were hoping to have some cheap beers that Beverly managed to snag, maybe a few hits off Bill's vape, and some stolen drags of Richie's medical grade joints. No one had questioned when he showed up one day saying his mother had gotten him one. The night hadn't even begun and already Eddie and Richie were arguing over who got to be DJ. Stan, opting for a hit of the vape instead of the Advil tonight, jumped in stating he was DJ. One crisis averted. Until about ten minutes later when Richie wanted to sit somewhere and Eddie refused to give it up. The other losers were determined to have a good time despite their friends. 

Later in the night both boys had calmed down to quite a bit of shot-gunning and a beer each. Richie was trying to toss an insult Eddie's way, and when it fell flat the whole group erupted in laughter. 

“Yeah, yeah, you guys try being this funny while you're stoned.” 

“Well, Beverly and I are also high, and we could have come up with way better comebacks than that.” Mike said and Stan giggled. 

“Yeah, your powers are just weak because it's Eddie. Your subconscious can't really insult him anymore.” Stan interested. Eddie’s face lit up and he acted like he had finally won. 

“Oh, you're no better Eddie…” Bill let out an impressive cloud of sour skittle smelling vapor. 

“Excuse you, my comebacks are fine, always have been, it's this one whose brain has turned to mush.” Eddie motioned to Richie, who he was leaning against. 

“I dare you guys to roast each other. See how far you guys can go before someone backs out now that you're dating.” Beverly spoke up, coming alive again after having zoned out for a bit. 

They used to roast each other all the time as kids, most of them would participate, but it usually came down to Richie and Eddie. 

“Uh, no. I don't have to prove my skill to you all, plus I would want to make Eddie here cry.” Richie said trying to fill in with some humor and move on. 

“Cry huh? That would be a first…” Eddie said suggestively, looking down at Richie's pants before back up, with a shrug. The other losers lost their shit, laughing even harder than before. Richie raised his eyebrows at his boyfriend and smirked. Oh it was on. 

“Get off me.” Richie said sitting up more. 

“Alright how are we doing this?” Richie asked stumbling as he stood up. 

“The only thing that your mouth is good for is talking trash, so you might think you're gonna win this, but we both know who’s going to come out on top. Like usual.” Eddie started off strong, before anyone could even think to respond to Richie.

“Oh, what was that? Sorry, I could barely hear you up here at a normal height for a teenage boy.” Richie said then laughing as Eddie huffed. Eddie had grown a lot, but he was still a few inches shorter than Richie.

“Yeah, yeah, I'm short, but what good does being tall do, if your boyfriend still has to catch all the bugs that fly in through your window?” Eddie had gotten closer to Richie and had taken his fingers, making them into a pretend but on Rich’s arm, making the boy jump away. 

The rest of the losers were loving this. It was prime time entertainment as far as they were concerned, watching close back and forth like a tennis match. It went on for a few more rounds, some better than others. They went at each other as best they could messed up. Richie brought up Eddie’s germ issues, and his mother, and Eddie got him right back with his gangly limbs, and status as a horndog. 

“You know Eddie talks a big game, really, he sounds convincing too, but if you knew how much he teased me you might understand.” He looked to Eddie now, “What if I had told your mother..her son was a,” he paused to check Eddie out, “ _ cruel _ motherfucker.” He said pulling away hissing, as if his words had been hot. It wasn't his best, but it did have Eddie blushing. 

“My mother would probably agree with me, in fact, it's not just me, it's everybody who thinks that you're fucking ugly. I mean those glasses? What did Steve Urkel choose those frames?” Eddie laughed and looked around at his friends. They all took a moment, and stared at Richie, who was also attempting to see himself without moving. 

“Oh my god, you do have Urkel glasses!” Stan gasped, and suddenly the whole room was making jokes and laughing, and Richie was shocked. 

“It's your turn Rich. Or will you admit that I'm the best?” Eddie said then and Rich was still huffing and pouting about the last round, he waved his hands up in the air and walked off. The crowd boo'd and Eddie laughed, taking a moment to be victorious. Eventually he decided he should go check in with Richie. Finding him outside smoking a cigarette, Eddie came up and wrapped his arms around his waist. 

“Hey, don't be all sad, it was just a game.” Eddie spoke into his boyfriend's t-shirt. 

“I know, I'm not that upset about that.” 

“Then what's up?” Eddie walked around to face Rich. 

“Nothing it's stupid.” He was trying to save it off, putting out his cigarette and moving to pull Eddie back inside to join the rest. 

“Richie, tell me.” Eddie crossed his arms. Refusing to move if they didn't talk. 

“I...it's just, that was...hotter than it had any right to be. There, I said it.” He groaned, looking up at the sky before rubbing his face, embarrassed. 

“Oh...oh my god! Richie!” Eddie just laughed, which made Richie groan again, louder, wanting this conversation to be over with. 

“Well…” Eddie was doing his best to keep himself composed as he walked over to the taller boy. Wrapping his arms around his neck, he kissed him, and then pulled back a bit to speak. 

“I don't know about all that, but if you want we can leave soon and go back to your place, I'll be happy to ‘come out on top’ there too.” He said with a wink. Richie just made a small happy noise and kissed him again. And just as quickly as the sweet moment had come it was gone again as Bill came to find them bringing all the other losers with him. 

“They're out h-here being gross. A-again!” 

“You have no idea Big Bill.” Richie laughed and Eddie smirked, and couldn't hold it in anymore. 

“Richie thought being roasted was hot!” he exclaimed and Beverly yelled, and they all laughed together as Richie turned bright red, chasing Eddie around the backyard.

The rest of the night went by pretty normal, Richie and Eddie were annoying, Stan got hilariously more drunk as the night progressed, and Ben ended up coraling them back inside, to calm down and get ready for bed. It was then that the happy couple made their depart, and much to everyone's confusion and glee, so did Stan and Mike. 

“You owe me five bucks Bill! See everyone later!” Eddie called as they closed the door, ending another great night with friends. 

**Author's Note:**

> Alright guys, I know my roasting skills are terrible, and I didn't want anyone to really have hurt feelings at the end so I ended with some humor instead. If anyone wasn't aware the lyrics were the lines:  
"What if I had told your mother, her son was a cruel mother fucker." and  
"It's not just me, it's everybody who thinks that you're fucking ugly." All credit to those lines go to Melanie Martinez and the K-12 album.  
If you are on tiktok and/or want to go check out the specific video that this fic was inspired by the profile that the video is on is: @galacticstitch_cosplay and the other cosplayer is @hyasings  
They are great cosplayers and tiktokers and you should go check them out!!!  
Alright guys, there we go! I promise more fics are coming, lots. I just have a lot going on right now.  
As always you are welcome to follow me on tumblr @iwantyourbloodonmylips and pinterest @abusemesoftly and please remember to stay safe and be careful! don't drink or smoke underage! Love you guys, see you next time!!!
> 
> Hey guys! If anyone wanted to help me out of a bad situation, maybe consider donating to my gofundme or ko-fi?  
Gofundme.com/helpmegetback2chicago  
Or   
Ko-fi.com/jettcasey   
It would mean a lot, and really help me out. ♡


End file.
